


Remember Me

by Lululeigh



Category: Kuroshitsuji | Black Butler
Genre: Alternate Universe - Hospital, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Cancer, F/M, Mentions of Cancer
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-08-05
Updated: 2015-08-05
Packaged: 2018-04-13 03:35:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,428
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4506201
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lululeigh/pseuds/Lululeigh
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Being alone was the only emotion she felt nowadays. As her life continued to tick away with each passing moment, she had to wonder if this was even a life worth living anymore. What was the point? Would she even be remembered?</p>
            </blockquote>





	Remember Me

**Author's Note:**

> Well andantin0 gave me enough courage to post this. Initially it was only meant for mythetic because today is her birthday, but I suppose others may be interested in reading as well. The AU is based off an idea Maddy and I had awhile ago that we never actually sat down to write out. Basically it’s a Grelliam AU where Grell is a cancer patient and William is the doctor who is taking care of her.
> 
> I do caution people reading this who are sensitive to these kinds of topics since they are heavily present, so please keep that in mind. This drabble takes place around the end of the whole story, so it’s really more like a snippet. But anyways, enjoy! And for one last time, Happy Birthday Maddy~! <3

_Solitude._ As the rain continued to beat down hard against the windows of the hospital room, Grell could only sit and listen to the noise it created, doing her best to keep her mind from wandering to much bleaker ideas. Time passed slowly now during these days, as if to say that there wouldn’t be many more left for her to experience. She was okay with this, knowing that in her current state of health that she shouldn’t expect to live for much longer. It was almost as if the gods had cursed her to end up like this since the day she was born.

Leaning carefully up against the pillows which lay on the bed to support her back, she took a moment to stare up at the ceiling, the sound of the storm outside invading her every thought even when she tried to ignore it. Just what had she done to deserve dying in a hospital bed of a disease which took away her only chance of obtaining happiness? Her doctor’s assurance that she did have a slight chance of pulling through was no help either, but she knew that he only said such things because there was not much else to say. Drug treatments had failed, and even though she had undergone a hysterectomy just a few months prior, it provided only short relief as the cancer quickly spread to other parts of her body. She became more short of breath with each passing day, her appetite declining along with her strength and energy. Coughing up blood and severe chest pain was just around the corner, with the eventually end leading to-

“Grell? Are you awake?”

She hadn’t even heard him knock on the opened door of the hospital room, too caught up in her thoughts to have even realized that he was standing right there. The room was dark but there was a small amount of light coming from the hall, making it difficult for her to see anything about him other than his outline. Why on earth had her doctor dropped by at this late hour?

“I’m always awake. Can’t sleep with the storm brewing outside.”

“May I come in?”

“Shouldn’t you be at home? Or at least asleep in the break room?”

“I have my own reasons for not being able to sleep as well.”

He stepped forward into the dark, his clean black shoes clicking softly against the hard ceramic tiles of the floor. She watched him out of the corner of her eye, afraid to see if his expression carried any more bad news, though at this point, it didn’t really matter. Stopping at the side of her bed, he checked her monitors, making certain that all was well before continuing with the real reason as to why he had come to visit her. He kept one hand hidden behind his back, most likely holding a clipboard or some other piece of equipment he didn’t wish for her to see just yet.

“How are you feeling?”

“You already know the answer to that.”

“It’s my job to ask my patient’s regardless.”

“Cut to the chase. What’s the real reason for the late night visit William?”

“A smart woman like yourself should at least be able to figure that out.”

“I still don’t see what you’re getting at.”

The darkness of the room didn’t help her to see what he had pulled out from behind his back so quickly, but maybe he had planned it like that. He placed the object on her lap, having a bit of weight to it and the bottom half being wrapped in a cloth. She did her best to focus her attention on it, and as the picture became clearer in her head, she gasped out of surprise. _Glass roses?_

“I figured the scent of real ones would bother you. These will also continue to be beautiful as long as they aren’t broken.”

“What is the meaning of this?”

She looked to him with a puzzled and confused look, picking up the wrapped bouquet carefully and holding it close to her body. They were still beautiful even though they gave off no smell, almost better than real roses in a certain way.

“Happy birthday Grell.”

“Wait, what-”

“I noticed the date was approaching when I checked your files a few weeks ago. Had you forgotten?”

“I must have…”

 _Her birthday._ Was she really so ill that she had lost track of time? If today really was her birthday, that would mean she had been living for twenty-five years now. Twenty-five and dying in a hospital bed of an unbeatable disease. It seemed just like her kind of luck.

Oh, but the flowers. How lovely they were, trapped forever in an eternal place in time, perfectly in bloom and never to wither away. She laughed at the irony, stroking the petals of one the smooth glass flowers. Ironic, yet incredibly thoughtful. It was obvious he had spent quite a lot of time thinking about this gift.

“What is it?”

“How ironic of you to give me a present would out live me.”

“Well, they do suit you best. Think of it as a way for people to remember you by, giving the ones you treasure a flower so that you will always be with them.”

His words alone told her just how much thought he had put into this gift, but also suggested at the fact that she would not live through his. _Ironic and cruel,_ that’s just how he was, Doctor William T. Spears of the Royal London Hospital. As cruel as he appeared, he was truly kind to his patients, never telling lies about their current condition and helping out in whatever ways he could. She was lucky to have him, despite how much trouble and grief she must have caused. What would become of her in his memory when she passed on?

“Grell, what are you-”

“So you’ll always have a memory of me. That’s what you said, is it not? Don’t go back on your word now, it’s rude to tell lies to a lady~”

She had carefully picked one of the roses from the bunch, extending it towards him with a shaky hand. His warm hand held her cold one for a moment before gently taking the rose, holding onto it with a careful hand as he sat down in the visitor’s seat beside the bed. Grell hoped that he wouldn’t just throw it away later like all the other’s had done to her, though she felt a warm assurance in her chest that he was not like all those other men.

“Thank you, William, for all of this. I can’t remember the last time anyone ever gave me a present for my birthday, or even celebrated with me for that matter.”

“Well, then I’m glad I got to be a part of this day with you. There’s no need to thank me though. It’s my job as a doctor to look out for my patients and make sure they are in as much comfort as possible.”

Right, _it was just a job. Nothing more, and nothing less._ How could she have forgotten? He had no real affections for like she did for him. It was a silly mistake of hers to even think that this gift was supposed to imply those sentiments. As much as the anger coursed through her body, she couldn’t bring herself to be mad at him. It was her own fault after all. Perhaps she should just continue to act like this relationship she wanted so desperately was all one sided.

Relaxing back against the pillows on the bed, she tried to calm herself enough to sleep, mindful of the roses which she continued to hold close to her body. She wouldn’t know what to do if any of them broke, though she couldn’t part with them just yet. Who else could she give one to? Ronnie? There was not many people in her life she considered special. Perhaps she would entrust them to William to look after. At least like this she could be with him forever.

Being alone was her only fear. How terrible it would be to die alone with no one you cared for there to see you take your last breath. For tonight she would be okay, surrounded by the sounds of the storm brewing outside and the quiet breathing of the man who had given her the best birthday present she could have asked for; _a gift of eternal remembrance._


End file.
